No time off for good behaviour

Morally speaking
I was miles ahead of the competition
wasn't I ha ha

For instance my
quest for nirvana never focused
simply on a sari clad
Shilpa Shetty (oh mama) lugging
an eight-figure dowry up
a dimly lit staircase
oh no

A series of unfortunately messy affairs
were always my specialty
and hightailing it out of town
before dawn in just my Y-fronts
(even though I only wear boxers)
is how I'd best like to remember it
- a series of fantasised escapades
you know
paid for ultimately though
by my ever-loving wife
who thought
along with Vee
and Auntie Mimi
and Uncle Fariduddin Agha
and the entire cast of Fifty-Fifty
(except for Ismail Tara and the fat guy
who always played the traffic cop)
that incarceration of twenty to life
in cocooned security would surely
cure me of my ills and woes
and holy psychoses by transferring them
onto chronologically organised photographs
dating back to eternity and recalled
fondly
years later as the happy couple
flips through the oversized pages
of a never-ending series of
gilt-edged photo albums
(laid out by year)

(minos - march 2007)